[Editor’s Note: The views of this column do not necessarily reflect those of SOHH.com]
1. The Candy Shop
Doggies, I know the majority of y’all are like me and have a sweet tooth for T&A but this week was like getting that golden ticket into Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory. LOL. I mean, Amber Rose’s nude pics leaking on the Internet and now you got Diddy/Cassie sh*t floating around as well? SMFH. Somebody lost, BIG TIME! Let’s just jump right into things and get the water boiling b/c Amber Rose stole the show, in my opinion, with these pictures.
Kanye West‘s curvy former girlfriend Amber Rose is in the center of a naked photo scandal as explicit pictures leak online purportedly showing her both topless and completely nude. The racy photos — posted by the adult website worldstarhiphop.com on Tuesday — show several photos of a woman with her breasts exposed through her clothes; other images show her completely naked.
^ F*CK YOU WORLD STAR HIP HOP! LMFAO!!! J/K. But on some real sh*t, doggies. How the h*ll do they end up getting this? I mean, even when Trina had those nasty a** pics that leaked on the Internet last year, WSHH had them as well. That’s just some stone cold sh*t. No wonder 5-0 Cent tried to get credit for taking them down……for 2 HOURS. LMFAO!!!! Now that y’all got watery eyes over Amber Rose, let’s take a glimpse at Cassie.
There has been all kinds of speculation as to whether and what the nature of Diddy and Cassie’s relationship. Well according to a ROCK SOLID MTO snitch, Diddy is “head over heels” in love with Cassie. And well, the below pic, certainly shows them all loved up. Congrats to Diddy for finding LOVE in his life. And Cass seems happy too . . . so congrats to her also.
^ SMFH. Call me crazy, doggies, but WTF? Clearly Puffles has no idea that this makes him look like R. Kelly. Clearly. But besides all that, I got to say, I’m not totally convinced. Yeah, Media Take Out tried to fake us out with some blurry spots but I don’t know. Doesn’t it look like she is rocking some granny panties? LOL. I mean, didn’t Diddy have more extreme photos for his KING/Unforgivable fragrances? SMFH.
Now as far as side by side comparisons, let’s not bullsh*t each other. Amber Rose’s sh*t clearly wins but let’s analyze it real quick. Self-photo snaps? SMH. Nude? She played it smart and y’all doggies want to know how? First off, she didn’t take any shots with her p*ssy spread out like Cassie had done a couple years ago, so clearly this was some intentional sh*t. Secondly, by only showing off her t*tties, this is no worse than what we saw when she was on the beach with Kanye West a few years ago. F*ck a third reason, y’all should get the idea by now. This has to be one of the worst publicity stunts I’ve seen in a minute. OK, we get that she went from Kanye West’s d*ck to Wiz Khalifa‘s one-hit d*ck. But I mean, d*mn, having to leak this sh*t out? Funny thing is I bet she sent it to a friend and was “surprised” that they some how, some way ended up across the Internet. F*ck outta here. Something don’t smell right doggies, y’all be the judges.
2. Money Talks, Bullsh*t Walks
Doggies, just because I would have sexual relations with Rihanna doesn’t mean I believe every thing she is saying and promoting. SMH. I thought that her “S&M” music video was more PG than X-treme in my opinion so for all this fussing about a video that only has controversy over her not even deep throating a banana? SMFH. WTF? But what I started realizing with all of this “outrage” is that some of it is bullsh*t, if not all of it. LOL.
“RT @loveririforever @rihanna no….. its tue boo :/ in ma country is blocked…. youtube says that only the ppl more than 18 can see it :/ … @loveririforever not true, they watched Umbrella…I was full nude…U can now view the S&M video on www.Rihannanow.com UNFLAGGED!!!,” she tweeted February 1st.
“@ciarastan4life WATCH S&M on RihannaNow.com NOW”
“#crackyowhip #RihannaNavy WE NEED S&M TO CRACK TOP 10 ON U.S. ITUNES NOW!!! BUY IT HERE!!! @Rihanna – S&M – itun.es/iFm7RB #iTunes-2” (Rihanna’s Twitter)
^ SMFH. Doesn’t this make y’all feel like she is bullsh*tting? Like, is she acting surprised? And personally, if she was real serious, she’d be absent from Twitter for a few days and handling that sh*t. Seriously.
“S&M,” Rihanna’s latest single, has had its title changed to “Come On” on the U.K.’s BBC Radio 1, and the singer is apparently not happy about the censorship from across the pond. “Are you f*cking kidding me??? I’m on it!” Rihanna posted on Twitter today (Feb. 6) after she was informed of the change; when a fan asked if she was okay with the title situation, the pop star wrote, “Absolutely NOT!!!” Island Def Jam did respond to a request for comment at press time. (Billboard)
^ “……are you f*cking kidding me???” SMFH. F*ck outta here with her candy a**, doggies. I don’t buy it for a second. But I won’t lie, doggies, finding out she jacked the sh*t out of Dave LaChappelle was funny as h*ll.
The alleged racy and plagiarized scenes begin with Rihanna walking her ‘dog’ Perez Hilton. The Barbadian pop artist is dressed in late and has the gossip blogger on a leash. However, in 2002 David LaChapelle took a picture for Vogue, representing a woman who is dressed in the same way as Rihanna, who also walks her leashed ‘dog’ who is actually a man. In another scene Rihanna is a pink striped room with other girls. She is wearing a big red afro wig and they are all dancing on furniture. In a photo titled ‘Striped Face,’ LaChapelle represents several girls in a pink striped room, wearing big red afro wigs while dancing on furniture. Does it ring a bell? (Suite 101)
^ SMFH. I’m calling it, doggies. Just like Kanye West had us fooled thinking that getting “Banned” was such a big deal, looks like Rihanna is trying to make us think all this f*ckery going on with her video is an outrage. SMFH.
3. Doggy of the Week: Rick Ross
Doggies, I’ve been telling y’all since 2009 that Rick Ross ain’t the one you want to be f*cking with
in a bad way. LOL. Easily one of the hottest rappers out right now and most, if not all, of y’all doggies are finally starting to “get it.” Look at how many got d*mn co-signs this fat a** doggy has. Diddy, Nicki Minaj, Kanye West, T.I., Jadakiss, Lil Wayne, sh*t, Game, Fat Joe, I mean, the list goes on, and on, and on. But all of that to the side, doggies, just look at the past seven days. Turns out doggy’s Maybach Music Group ain’t just signing artists, but about to get signed its d*mn self. Roc Nation? Interscope? Cash Money? WTF?! And if that wasn’t enough to give Ross the “Doggy of the Week” nod, then look at his latest signings. Wale? Meek Mill? SMH. D*mn, Wiz Khalifa, you might have f*cked up if it wasn’t for that d*mn “Black & Yellow.” LOL. To top it all off, Ross, the real Rick Ross, is showing how d*mn thirsty he is to take-down “The Boss.” LOL! Give it up, doggy!
Apparently, all the powermove business talk Rozay teased me with in Miami rings true. Besides the impending signings of Wale (I heard the deal went through yesterday, but now I can’t get anyone to confirm) and Meek Mill to his imprint, he’s being courted by the music industry’s bosses for MMG. Inside sources have told me the players include: Jay-Z’s Roc Nation/Sony; Birdman’s CMB; Lyor Cohen and the good folks at Warner; and Diddy and Iovine at Interscope. Wait, no Def Jam? The tone arm’s gonna let their heavyweight plant is flag somewhere else without a fight? Hmm. I’d advise against that Antonio. Ha!
^ LOL. Say what y’all want, but it’s clear. Rick Ross is in demand. I mean, a d*mn bidding war for a RAP LABEL in 2011?!?! LOL! D*mn, I thought those all ended after Drake caught the pressure and inked with Universal Motown. LOL.
“EVERYONE WELCOME @MEEKMILL TO THE EMPIRE!!! #MMG,” Ross tweeted.
With the Maybach Music Group still in a middle of a bidding war, the man himself, Wale has confirmed that he officially inked his deal with Rozay’s empire, but is still being managed by Roc Nation. Congrats!
^ WTF? Is recruiting dope a** lyrical rappers the new trend in rap these days? I mean, d*mn. You got Eminem and Slaughterhouse/Yelawolf, Jay-Z and J.Cole/Jay Electronica and now Rick Ross and Meek Mill/Wale? SMFH. Rap is actually looking like it might be alive again, doggies.
“I was willing to go all the way to the Supreme Court when I fought it the first time,” he added. “I’m not afraid of courts. I fought ’em from a jail cell, when you have to sleep on the floor and they wake you up at three in the morning, [where] you sleep on a concrete floor, next to a steel toilet with piss on it… So if I can do that, now I can walk inside the courtroom, and sit on a cushioned bench. They dealing with a different animal. I’m a different animal than most of the people walking the street now.”
^ SMFH. Call me a sick son of a doggy, doggies b/c this is such a f*cking non-boss mentality. Admitting your weaknesses in an attempt to sound strong? SMFH. You lose, Freeway Ricky Ross. The fact you’re admitting you’ve been through h*ll and have yet to crack Rick Ross’ pockets for some loose change is f*cking silly. You’d have a better shot at having Game cough up $50K for his name “The Game” being a reference to you handling business in The Drug Game. LOL. It’s up for debate, but doggies, Freeway looks straight b*tch-made complaining like this. LOL.
4. Mrs. Butterworths: Jeny Romero & Bernice Burgos
Doggies, I’m making history all by my d*mn self. LOL. Blame it on the
alcohol Pulse Report from last week, b/c those Nvus Twins had me twisted but I had to do it again. Now this week might not have twins, well, in “that” kind of way, LOL, but I couldn’t turn down an opportunity to feature two former Mrs. Butterworths together. It brings me great pleasure, LITERALLY, to re-introduce y’all thirsty a** doggies to Jeny Romero and Bernice Burgos. Truly the best of both worlds. Doggies, y’all owe me. Oh, and it wouldn’t be right if I didn’t give a big shout-out to TheDynastySeries.com for the hook-up! These photos are hot, hot, hot!!!
^ LOL. I dare a motherf*cking doggy to pop sh*t off on these picks. This is better than the Green Bay/Pittsburgh match-up right here doggies.
5. “STFU” Honors
LMFAO!!! Doggies, we have some brand spanking new inductees this week as we welcome Lil Jon for thinking people underestimate him because he’s a rapper…now a CRUNK A** WILD YEEEAAAAH, WHHHATTTTTT, OKAAAAAAY doggy, Uncle Luke for trying to put on for his city as mayor but still holding a hard-on for sex-related topics, Maino for trying to defend running up on a teenager. LMFAO. Ah man, doggies, we don’t stop there either. Following those three doggies, we’re gonna go to T-Pain who is having a T-Meltdown and lastly….SMFH….we’re gonna end this sh*t with a rapping model that clearly doesn’t know d*ck about rating doggies. Still not sure what you’re reading? Doggies, welcome to the motherf*cking “SHUT THE F*CK UP” Honors section!
“People think, ‘Oh, I don’t need to worry about him,’ and they underestimate me because I am a rapper,” Jon explained in an interview. “They’re not realizing I have a vast knowledge in all types of business and I am a real threat…I’m not just a rapper, and the music business has made me built for the kinds of challenges we do on the show. The hours we have to keep — I am in the studio from noon until 5 in the morning. I am used to working long hours with no sleep. Everyone on the show looked at me like, ‘He isn’t going to be able to do this,’ and I proved them wrong.“
“Even though all my stripper friends are gonna be mad at me, I think we can stimulate the economy with a tax on strippers. They make all this money and don’t pay taxes. I’d take that cash and put it into a fund where it supports youth athletics for girls like cheerleading or softball. Or it can go to help pay for existing little girls programs that are struggling to get government assistance.”
“I just wanted to have a conversation with her because you know people sometimes see rappers or artists and they think, sometimes, they ‘need’ to say certain things about them,” Maino added. “Maybe you not a Maino fan but at the same time I’m a human. I’m just minding my business. Now I could see if I was in the store being out of pocket but I think I handled that with humility. I think I was a gentleman about it. I actually spoke to her like she was my little sister. It was more or less like, ‘You don’t really have to do that. You don’t have to be that way.’ … I thought it was interesting that she was doing it and didn’t know that I knew. All I did was turn around, walk a couple more steps to her and said, ‘How you doing? I know that you’re [tweeting] about me. But you don’t really got to do that. You’re a little girl and I’m a grown man.’“
“Since nobody wants to respect this form of art that you all say we “love” so much, I’m just gonna go ahead and start leakin the album myself tonight. well maybe I shouldn’t rant but everybody was lookin at me strange when I said I didn’t wanna drop my album, it’s not that album sales weren’t doin good for hip hop and rnb, it just felt like no one respected “music” anymore. You know what, you guys enjoy the post game and I’ll find my own ways to take care of my family. Oh and bty the “I Am T-Pain” Toy Microphone is comin in June (google that). To all the hackers and leakers thanks for showin interest in my music but I feel like I’ve been taken advantage of when I’m just tryin to let ppl know what’s goin on with my music and then you audio highjack it for your own amusement I would have been happier if you would have just waited to get a better quality version of the song but it’s cool its pretty much my fault anyways, so for the most part y’all can suck a fart out of a homeless mans a**.”
“I wouldn’t want to be with [Wayne] on any romantic level but a 10 for his work ethic and he’s got a lot of style. He’s not my type at all. I would say 7. Jay-Z is in the 7 category. I don’t know. He’s not my style. [Eminem] 10. He’s so fine and adorable. [Pitbull and T.I.] 10. [T.I.’s] handsome and he seems to be like a gentleman. [Rick Ross?] Uh, zero. Girl, I don’t like his beard. I don’t really care if you’re a big guy but the beard looks like it’s gonna itch my face. That’s all…[Kanye West,] he’s a handsome guy. Hmm… 9. He’s really cute. Crazy, but that doesn’t stop him from being handsome. 50 Cent is not cute to me, but I’m so attracted to his business ethic over anyone. I would say 10 on business ethic alone. Probably an 8. He’s not ugly. He’s not my type though at all. [Waka?] Oh, God. You know what? Let me give Rick Ross a five and Waka a zero for this one. Rick is winning this one right now [laughs]. [Wiz Khalifa?] He’s not my type at all. He’s a 7. I hope these guys don’t get pissed off at me! [Yelawolf?] 20! He really is a 20 with his fine a**!”
***D*mn doggies, how do we go from the Super Bowl last weekend to some wack a** Grammy Awards this Sunday? LOL. I guess it’s just me, b/c if y’all want to know, the Grammys is set-up like h*ll. The hot artists like Rick Ross and Young Jeezy don’t ever get nominated anyway, so WTF? Anyway, in two weeks we got the NBA All-Star Weekend coming up in LA. Y’all heading out there, let me know. Still trying to get tickets. Actually, don’t let me know, I don’t want y’all to get some doggies hitting you up acting like they’re me. LOL. Aight doggies, it’s cold as h*ll out here and it’s the weekend. Catch y’all on the flip side. PS…I got money saying Eminem wins five or more trophies this weekend. –BB***